Somewhere Out There

I have had the idea of writing this article for a long time. I just kept putting it off because I was lazy. But, sometimes in life, things happen that we all sit back and take inventory. What is is about the human mind that causes us to turn to the Almighty when trauma happens?

Remember, the Trade Towers? I cannot fathom, how many people near that scene and also at home watching on television re-visited with the Lord. This tragic scene certainly awakened the "sub-conscious" in all of us. Tears flowing, doubts running through minds and most of all, there was that "innermost" feeling of needing to talk to someone. Someone that was bigger than the catastrophe itself. This was one of the most terrifying events in our history. But, why, I ask, do we need a catastrophe to remind us that, yes, there is someone up there or out there that created this universe and lets things happen.

Some people, in desperation blamed everything on very bizarre elements. But, the simple fact is still with us, on that day, we as a nation had a personal relationship with "God". Like it or not, we asked "God" for protection from further peril. Why is it, that when someone is getting close to dying, the family, friends and others think about or talk about a relationship with "God". Why not have a relationship of some sort all of the time.

I am not a Bible thumping person. I was raised in a Roman Catholic family. I was taught by the Dominican Nuns how to pray and why. It didn't sink in at all. I was an altar boy and when I was in my late teens, I had totally drifted from the religious regimen. My, mother used to "scold" us and force us to get up on Sunday morning to go to 5:00 AM Mass with her and my father. As, I got older, the meaning of religion only came into my life during funerals, weddings and occasionally someone being sick.

I don't know how many folks were like this, but I was. This brings me to the reason for this article. As, I mentioned, I was not one of those folks that waved the Bible in your nose, because I thought my way was the only way and you were facing eternal damnation.

Well, as I got older, and I guess a lot of folks go through this, I saw life starting to take on a very different meaning. I saw my circle of friends starting to shrink. Some died and others just drifted away. But, the fact is, all of a sudden I was more aware of the meaning "Life is short" and we are only here for that short time. Yeah, I had my atheistic friends that didn't believe in someone being responsible for the birds flying, nature, sun, moon and life itself. I began to focus on life itself. How was it created? Who had the ability to create life?

As, I said, some of my friends were of the belief that life happened and we are here because of evolution. Still, today and for the past thousands of years, no one can explain the "mystery of life". I can, related to a couple of happenings in my life that is the motivation or reason for this article. We all have seen death a couple of times. We mourn, pray or at least show respect with solemnity. My, Mom lived to be (102) years old. We were truly blessed to have her for those many years. She was never sick nor did she lose her mental faculties during this time. She just decided one day, that she was tired and told us, "take over" and she passed away in front of all of her children. Not something that would cause the earth to stop spinning but something in the lives of my brothers and sisters that gave us a reflection on the life of this aged woman.

She was buried in our local Church. But, the thing that left the impression on me, was while she was in her final moments, she insisted that each of her children give her a hug and a kiss. I will never forget that. Now, when the funeral took place, her six sons were the pallbearers and accompanied the casket into our church. This was a cold rainy day in April in Michigan. Once the casket was in the Church and the service began, a strange thing happened. Remember, it was a cold rainy day.

Once my daughter started to sing for her Grandmother, the sky cleared up for just a few minutes. The beam of sunlight, narrow and coming from above shone only on my Mom's casket and no where else in the Church. I didn't wonder why? I was just hypnotized that here was this (102) year old woman, who never failed to say her daily "thanks" to the Lord but at this time in our life, she was either singled out, blessed or chosen for this strange phenomena. Others might scoff and say " It was just a coincidence". True, it might have been a coincidence, but it was an event that made me more aware of the meaning of life in my own personal life and that coincidence was monumental to me.

The other incident that affected my feelings about life and whether we are here for a purpose or we just exist as my nature loving friends believe was the death of my wife of (32) years. I don't know how many husbands have had the pleasure of holding their wife's hand and watching the scope in the critical care ward, just stop. When this happened, I knew I was experiencing something that was reserved for very few men.

Usually, it is the other way around. The wives always bury the husbands. Roseann died of Stage IV, Adeocarcinoma of the lungs. Lung cancer at it's worst. When, I took her to see the Doctor, he immediately ordered a scan and admitted her to the hospital. At the hospital, I asked him candidly, "Doc, how long"? He looked at me and said "six". I asked, "six years" and he answered "no". I knew then how fatal this disease had gotten into my wife's body..We brought her home so that, I could be her nurse. Everyone came over to visit her. The many trips to the store with that "ugly" stocking hat and the push cart with ribbons and bells on it, so that she could enjoy her outings to WalMart was a daily part of life.

Of, course the children were supportive of their mother, but I couldn't tell them that she only had six months. So, I kept that secret from them until now. Fair or not. I don't care what your feelings are, unless you have been through this same situation. You can only procrastinate. Now, here is the most bizarre ending to someone's legacy.

Roseann died on August 8, 1999. I had placed her into intensive care on August 5th. She was buried in Fort Myers, Florida from Resurrection Church. My buddy, Fr. Eddie McNamara made sure that she had the best for this Irish lass. It was a couple of weeks later that I finally had the courage to return to our condo in Orlando. When, I got there, I noticed the tent calender that the kids had bought for their mom. It was one of those biblical calendars with a different passage from the bible for every day.

I was curious and flipped the calendar to August 8th and I immediately sat down. I called my daughter, Kelly in Fort Myers and said " Kelly are you sitting down"? She said "why Dad"? Well, I want to read you the passage from the bible that is on your Mom's calendar the day she died. It was a passage from the New Testament and a Letter, from Timothy. Ironic, our son is named Timothy. But, the passage was "My cup runneth over, I have fought the good fight, today is the last day of my life". WOW. When, I read that, I had to sit down.

I told Kelly, this. "If anyone doesn't think that there is someone out there bigger than us, then tell them to call me. Someone makes the birds fly, the water run, the flowers grow and someone bigger than all of us provides these messages. It is up to you to listen

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Regis Sauger is a Licensed Mortgage Broker in Florida. He has written numerous aritlces on consumer credit. He has over 25,000 readers of his articles.

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